What should I feel?

This summer, one of my best friends, Thulani, and I were given the opportunity to lead worship on a mission trip in New Orleans. We decided to make a road trip out of it. From Indianapolis, our stops included (among others) Louisville, Nashville and Atlanta. You can check out the videos Thulani made documenting each day of the trip here. It was a grand time.

While we were in Nashville on day two of the trip, July 5th, Alton Sterling was shot and killed while being held down by police in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

The following day, July 6th, while we were en route to Atlanta, Philandro Castile was shot and killed in his car with his girlfriend and her four-year-old daughter after being pulled over by an officer in Falcon Springs, Minnesota.

Two police shootings of black men within two days. I had never seen Thulani, a black man himself, so disheartened.

These events took place hundreds of miles from the cities we were in, but the shock-wave which resulted was evident and crushing. Thulani was quiet that night; he was not his usual chipper self. We were both frustrated and upset, but he was fearful.

What could I do to comfort one of my closest friends when he felt less safe in this world solely because he is black? What could I say as we drove past red spray paint on buildings the following day pleading "JUSTICE FOR ALTON." What should I feel when I will never know the fear of being seen as a threat based on the color of my skin?

I don't know. I know I can be a friend to Thulani. Perhaps that's the best thing to do.